It is the Monday before Easter and the first and second stations of the cross begin with the Garden of Gethsemane and Judas’ betrayal. Jesus knew that both were going to happen, but that doesn’t diminish the pain. In the garden Jesus cried out to the Father to remove the impending crucifixion, but not just that, but to also remove the weight of sin that he would bear for mankind. He was an obedient son, and deferred to the wisdom of his Father. Even if his death were for the good of his creation, the knowledge that his Father would turn his back would feel like a great betrayal. It must have been terrifying (in his humanness) to comprehend something that had never occurred before in eternity. He would be alone.
Then there were footsteps and voices. Men carrying torches and clubs. It was time, and his followers were sadly asleep, not even able to stay awake with him for an hour. Jesus woke them, pointing to the angry crowd. Rubbing the fog of sleep from his eyes Thaddeus thought “it’s too dark. They won’t be able to recognize them.” But Jesus stood his ground against them.
Out of the shadows a man stepped, squinting his eyes for recognition. “It is Jesus,” he thought. Grabbing the shoulders of his once loved master, Judas kissed him on the cheek. Everything went crazy! Swords swung, lips swore, accusations filled the air. Jesus bent down and replaced the poor servants ear.
“So Jesus said to Peter, “Put your sword into its sheath; shall I not drink the cup that the Father has given me?” John 18:18. Without another word the disciples fled and the scriptures were fulfilled. “You have caused my companions to shun me; you have made me a horror to them.” Psalm 88:8.
Hours before they had reclined around a table eating and laughing, until Jesus talked began about blood and covenant. Those moments were sober, though they understood little of what he said. But finally the mood lifted as they left singing a familiar hymn.
In these first two stations we remember that the way to the cross, the Via Delarosa (The way of suffering) is a lonely road filled with betrayal, disappointment, and a troubled heart. We are blessed to live on this side of the cross and empty tomb. What we need to remember, is to never let slip from our minds the anticipation of agony that Jesus felt. Stop for a minute. Take a moment to consider this. We often jump from the garden to the cross, but in between, each step Jesus took was filled with anguish. The betrayal of Judas and Peter. The blind jealousy of the religious establishment. The political wrangling over responsibility. The question of truth as the embodiment of it stood before them. The crowds’ chant of death. The spit and whips, the torn flesh and drops of blood all raced through the mind of Jesus as he left the garden.
Anticipation can be as terrifying as the actual event. The brutality would come, but his anguish would have made the average man, no the most courageous man, run from what lay ahead. Again, what did Jesus say? “So Jesus said to Peter, “Put your sword into its sheath; shall I not drink the cup that the Father has given me?”
Have you ever been betrayed by an enemy, a friend, a spouse? Has a parent ignored you, hurt you, or allowed you to be hurt? Maybe you know someone who has gone through this kind of betrayal. Though we will never know the answer to why people would act in such ways, this we can know. Jesus understands. Jesus has experienced it, one hundred fold. Jesus has walked in your shoes and more. If you want the freedom and peace that comes through knowing Jesus, lay your burdens at his feet and follow him. Confess to him your pain and allow the Spirit to wash over you. He can and will bring healing to your soul.
For those of us who are followers, let’s not pretend we understand betrayal if we have never experienced it. At the same time we can come along and listen, pray, and be the rock others can lean on. In this moment, however, let us stop and worship our Savior who did not consider his love for us too light a thing that he would not take the first steps that led him to the cross. I’m just saying…
From the Bunker — Day 22
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